


I Still Need Love

by Thebigbadwolfandlittlered



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angsty Derek, Drinking, Hand Jobs, M/M, Song Inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-29
Updated: 2014-07-29
Packaged: 2018-02-10 22:05:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2041941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thebigbadwolfandlittlered/pseuds/Thebigbadwolfandlittlered
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek goes to Stiles for a one night stand, and he finds that he just can't stay away.</p>
<p>(Based entirely off the song Stay With Me by Sam Smith)</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Still Need Love

**Author's Note:**

> My [bro from camp](http://grandtheftlilo.tumblr.com/) asked for a song to Stay With Me by Sam Smith, she said any fandom so...
> 
> I own my entire existence to [Beth](http://bottleofcasgrace.tumblr.com/) for being my wonderful beta. <3
> 
> Also to [Carrick](http://ireallyamaboy.tumblr.com) for listening to me and rereading this for me like 30 times and reassuring me that yes Kat, your smut is not awful, and no Kat not everyone is gonna think you're an idiot.
> 
> All remaining mistakes are mine :)

3:51 AM. The numbers were glowing bright and intruding from the night stand. Derek glared at them and the saying ‘if looks could kill’ came to mind. He clenched his jaw and looked from the bright red numbers to look up at the ceiling instead. Stiles was laying next to Derek, or to be more accurate, laying on Derek. The younger boy’s head was tucked under Derek’s chin; the hair he’d grown out tickling slightly. Warm breath fell from his open mouth and spread across Derek’s chest. ‘At least he doesn’t drool.’ Derek thought with a small and fond smile. Stiles’ hand was wrapped around Derek’s waist with a death grip on his hip. Derek had an arm wrapped around Stiles, keeping the boy pressed tightly against him. Their clothes were on the floor and it seemed they always ended up there night after night.

Derek would always crawl through the window at around midnight, and leave by at least four.

It started with Derek being needy.

About a month ago Derek was a wreck. Everything was falling apart, and not gracefully. Derek had known this. Everything had been falling apart for a very long time, but this night in particular he himself was falling apart.

It was that night exactly seven years ago that his entire family died because of him.

So, Derek did what he did every year; he found absolution at the bottom of a bottle. Or 12 bottles.

This year was different though. He was in Beacon Hills-unlike all the other years. He was in town with Stiles, and even though Derek was across town he could still catch his scent but he wouldn’t let himself think about what that meant. At around 11 he started walking through town. He walked through back allies and unlit streets to avoid anyone seeing him, to avoid people in general. He was able to walk like he wasn’t drunk off his ass, but he was sure that was mainly due to his werewolf abilities. He just kept walking and walking, stumbling with no direction- or at least that’s what he thought because the next street he turned onto was Stiles'. He sighed but kept walking. Each step he took brought him closer to Stiles, to hearing his heartbeat. Derek just wanted to hear Stiles’ heartbeat.

There was no other quite like Stiles’. It was erratic and fast. Even while he was sleeping and calm as ever, his heart was still beating quickly in his chest.

Derek walked through Stiles’ backyard and looked up at the teen’s bedroom window. He didn’t remember giving his feet permission to move, but his legs were moving towards the house and his arms were reaching up to grab the railing to the roof when he jumped. He stumbled a bit when he got both feet on the slant leading up to Stiles’ bedroom window. As quietly as he could he walked up to the window and lifted the bottom pane up and he tried to crawl through with grace, but failed miserably as he fell in and his body hit the floor with a thick thud.

“Oh my god!” Stiles screeched out as he flailed so much he fell out of bed. He tried to stand up quickly but his feet were caught in the sheets and he tripped; falling to the floor again. “Shit, oh my god.” Stiles was being so loud and his voice was ringing in Derek’s ears.

“Shut up.” Derek mumbled, or slightly slurred. He honestly wasn’t even sure if he said it loud enough for Stiles to hear.

“Derek?” Stiles said with as much shock, but a lot less loud. Derek didn’t say anything back. He just sat on the floor leaning against the wall under the window. “God, you’re lucky my dad had the night shift tonight or your little werewolf ass would be full of bullets right now, let me tell you.” Derek still didn’t say anything, but that was pretty normal when he was with Stiles. “You really made a shit ton of noise when you were coming in, that’s pretty weird actually, you’re usually pretty stealthy-” Stiles paused for a moment as the wheels turned in his head. He was connecting dots. “Oh my god are you drunk? I thought werewolves couldn’t even get drunk.”

“If you drink enough, anyone can get drunk.” Derek said looking to Stiles for the first time since he busted in. He had been keeping his gaze directed at the floor or the opposite wall, but now that he looked at Stiles he wished he had kept his eyes there. Stiles’ hair was tossed in every direction and his shirt was tight fitting; sleeves gripping around his biceps and the fabric around his chest stretching to accommodate for the growing muscle from the teenager.

“He speaks!” is Stiles’ reply to him and he would’ve rolled his eyes if he hadn’t been busy checking Stiles out. “Why are you drunk? Actually, why are you here?”

Derek didn’t want to think about the answer to either of those questions. He didn’t want to think about it, let alone talk about it so he stood up with great effort and walked closer to the bed. 

“Oh god, you’re not going to kill me are you? I know some people get stripper drunk, or clingy drunk, but I really hope you don’t get ‘kill poor defenseless Stiles’ drunk because that wou-” Stiles was cut off as Derek leaned down and pressed his lips forcefully against Stiles’. The younger boy froze and didn’t even breath for a moment before he returned the kiss with such force their teeth clashed together and Derek's upper lip got caught. He moved his hand to the back of Stiles' neck to pull him back a bit from the kiss. Stiles calmed down and then resealed their lips with a much slower tone then before. The touch of Stiles' lips against his was soft and gentle at first before Derek brought the heat up slowly to something that would satisfy his drunken needs. Stiles wrapped his arms around Derek’s neck and pulled him onto the bed and he went willingly.

Soon enough just the press of Stiles’ mouth against his own wasn’t enough and he licked the seam of Stiles’ lips and they parted for him. Derek’s tongue dove in and swiped across every surface of Stiles’ mouth before moving to slide slickly against the younger boys tongue. He was pulling whimpers and moans from Stiles and he was swallowing them all down with greed and want. Stiles pulled away gasping for air.

“Humans can’t hold their breath as long as werewolves okay- oh fuck!” Derek moved onto Stiles’ neck as he was he talking and cut off the human’s rant as he reached under his shirt and swiped his thumb over Stiles’ nipple. There were some effective ways to shut Stiles up. Derek started to suck marks onto Stiles’ neck as he rolled his nipple between his thumb and pointer finger. Stiles moaned Derek’s name as he thrust his hips up into Derek’s clothed erection.

“Stiles,” Derek whispered into the hot skin of the human’s neck as he rolled his own hips down getting friction against his aching hard on. Stiles’ hands moved down from Derek’s shoulders to his lower back where they dipped under the older man’s shirt and skimmed across his back.

“We need to be wearing less clothes - you in particular.” Stiles said as Derek rolled his hips down again. He hissed with pleasure before he tugged at the bottom of Derek’s shirt. “Come on, off." Derek pulled away from Stiles long enough to pull his shirt off and he was back on Stiles in a second. Stiles’ laughter filled the room as he ran his hands over Derek’s newly naked chest. “How’s my shirt gonna get off me now?” Stiles’ breath hitched towards the middle as Derek softly bit at his neck. He didn’t want to stop touching Stiles, so he let one claw extend and he ripped down the middle of his shirt and tore at the rest until he could yank the fabric from underneath Stiles and toss it somewhere behind them. “Hey, I liked that shirt.” He was cut off as Derek reconnected their lips. He kept rolling his hips down into Stiles’. “D-Derek, oh fuck.” Hearing his name spill from Stiles’ lips made his hips stutter and a small moan escaped from his own mouth.

“Stiles, I- I,” Derek had no clue what he wanted to say. He was feeling so much all at once and his mind was still hazy from the alcohol and there were words pushing at his throat and he had no clue what they were.

”I know.” Stiles said with a serious look. “I know.” Derek was never more grateful for two words.

Derek kept an even pace as he continuously rolled his hips down, dragging moans from Stiles’ mouth and groaning into Stiles’ neck. He trailed his fingers down Stiles’ torso and dipped the tips under the elastic and paused for a second before Stiles thrust his hips up impatiently. He reaching into Stiles’ boxers and gripped the base of his dick and pulled it out. Stiles let out a sound that might have been Derek’s name as he reached down and pushed his pants and boxers down. Derek helped him tug them off and then they were tossed to the floor leaving Stiles completely naked.

“I’d feel a lot better if you’d get naked too.” Stiles said softly, his scent and heartbeat giving away his self-consciousness. Derek nodded as he reached down to try and undo his belt but his fingers were to uncoordinated and he just wanted the damn things off and a growl came from his chest as his frustration grew and then it melted away as Stiles rested a hand on top of Derek’s and lightly moved them away. Derek looked up and saw Stiles’ small and gentle smile and it wiped all of his aggravations and erased all of his unease. Stiles’ fingers worked Derek’s belt and the button to his jeans quickly and shoved lightly at them and helped Derek kick them off along with his briefs. Then it was just the two of them with no barriers. No clothing to separate them, and Derek had never felt more safe then he did right there with Stiles. Derek rolled his hips down against Stiles and they both moaned together as their cocks ran against each other and the friction was fantastic. They laid there and rutted against each other for a few more moments, exchanging moans and gasps of pleasure before Derek reached over to Stiles’ nightstand and pumped lotion onto his palm before moving between them and taking them both into his hand, the lotion making his movements smooth and he stroked them both together.

“Oh fuck, Derek.” Stiles whimpered as he pushed his hips up into Derek’s hand. Derek was gasping into Stiles’ neck. “Fuck, I- I’m close, Derek.” Stiles whispered and Derek nodded.

“Me too.” He said into the skin of Stiles’ neck. He felt completely safe there, inhaling the scent of Stiles and sex and himself, and the smell of them both was intoxicating.

“Derek, oh shit I’m gonna- Derek!” Stiles gripped at Derek’s back as he came across his chest and abdomen, strings of white shooting up high enough to hit Derek’s chest. Derek pulled back to he could see Stiles face when he came, and it only took two more strokes before he was painting Stiles with his come as well.

“Stiles,” He whimpered out as he pushed further into his hand. He fell to Stiles’ side so he wouldn’t crush him. They both lied there panting and enjoying the post orgasmic haze. Derek reached over and grabbed a hand full of tissues and cleaned them both off before he lay down on his back. Stiles moved closer into Derek’s side and they fell asleep together.

Derek woke up a few hours later at four and he slowly pulled himself from under Stiles and put his clothes back on and left via the window.

That was the first night they had sex. Derek avoided Stiles for three days after that, but he was never good at one night stands. He always got attached. Or maybe, he got attached and then had the one night stand he wasn’t sure what came first. But he started to crave Stiles’ touch. The feeling of his lips pressed against Derek’s, and how smooth his chest was. The first two nights he just lied in bed and tried not to think about Stiles as he lowered a hand past the elastic of his briefs, but less than 10 seconds in he would be whispering Stiles’ name into the silence around him as he thought about his pink lips, and how they felt when he was panting against Derek. On the third day, Derek knew he had to go back or he’d go crazy. His wolf was howling for the human and he was losing control of it.

So on the third night; he went back. They had sex, fell asleep, and Derek left before Stiles could wake up.

He did the same thing the night after that.

And the night after that.

And the night after that.

And for so many more.

It became a ritual. Derek would climb through Stiles’ window, and Stiles would sometimes say something, or sometimes not. They’d have sex and they lay there for a moment before Derek would clean them up and then they’d fall asleep. Derek would wake up a few hours later and at four he would reluctantly pull away from Stiles, get dressed, and leave through the window. That’s what happened every night.

Every night that is, until he got to this night. He didn't want to leave. Every bone in his body was telling him to stay, and he desperately wanted to. Stiles was so warm, and his breath was so comforting. God, Derek cared for Stiles so much but he knew the human could never feel the same. Stiles deserved so much more out of life. Derek was a good fuck, and that was it. Damn, he was getting so damn emotional about this, about Stiles and he needed to get his shit together because he got emotional about Jennifer, and about Kate, and about Paige and each and every one of them was cut out of his life. They each took so much from him, all that was left was this bleeding broken mess. He was destroyed for anyone else. No one could want him, he was so fucked up. Stiles especially. The kid was so damn smart, and worth so goddamn much he could do so much better then Derek.

But laying there with Stiles was so effortless, easy, and painless, Derek didn't want to leave. He never wanted to leave. Stiles was comfort and warm. He anchored Derek through storms inside himself, as well as the nights of the full moon.

Derek’s face changed into one of pain as his eyes clenched shut and he tried to get a hold of himself. He was losing control of himself. This whole thing was getting out of control, but he just wanted to stay. Stay with Stiles in his bed, stay with Stiles, period. He needed to get a grip on himself.

He turned to look at the clock. 3:59. Derek had to take a deep breath just to help push the pain further down so it wasn’t so close to the surface. He unwrapped his arm from around Stiles and was silently pulling himself out from beneath the boy he was falling in love with, when the clock turned 4:00 and the clock alarm went off. Derek tried to turn it off before Stiles could fully register it, but he was too late because Stiles’ eyes opened and he sat up and looked at Derek. There was a small tired smile on his face.

“Caught you.” Stiles said with a sleep raspy voice. Derek got the rest of the way out of bed and grabbed his briefs and pulled them on. He looked for his pants on the floor but saw them at the very end of the bed. He reached to grab them, but Stiles grabbed his hand instead. Derek looked up at Stiles, but didn’t move his hand.

“Stiles,” He started to say but Stiles shook his head and cut him off.

“Stay with me.” Stiles said softly. He didn’t look at Derek, his gaze was focused on the floor. Derek swallowed, unsure if he’d heard Stiles right.

“What?” Derek said studying Stiles’ face closely. Stiles’ cheeks flushed and he kept his eyes facing down.

“Stay here with me. Don’t go.” Stiles said looking up at the end, finally meeting Derek’s eyes. Derek’s mouth fell open slightly and for a moment he didn’t know what to say.

“Stiles, I- I can’t-” Stiles cut him off as he started to get angry.

“Why not? Why won’t you stay through one night? Why can’t you?” Stiles let go of Derek’s hand and he crossed his arms across his chest. He looked kinda ridiculous, sitting cross legged and naked with his arms crossed sternly but Derek saw it as nothing but serious.

“Because I...” Derek trailed off as he looked anywhere but at Stiles.

“Because why?!” Stiles got up from his bed and grabbed his sleep pants and put them on, ignoring his boxers all together. “Because you what?” Stiles was radiating anger and Derek swallowed thickly. He didn’t know what to say. “Get out.” Stiles said as he grabbed Derek’s shirt and threw it at him. Derek grabbed the shirt on instinct. “I am so fucking meaningless to you, you can’t even answer why you won’t stay the night. You can’t even tell me you want nothing to do with me outside of fucking.” Derek was wide eyed and frozen to the spot. Did Stiles really think that?

“Stiles-” Derek started to say but Stiles erupted with rage.

“I said get the fuck out! I am not a fuck toy, Derek! I am a fucking person with feelings.” Tears were welling up in Stiles’ eyes and his face was flushed red with anger. “I tell you I want you to stay and you can’t even look at me! You can’t even tell me why.” The end was whispered brokenly. Derek still couldn’t move. He wanted to move forward and comfort Stiles, he hated that he made Stiles cry. He hated himself so much for it. Stiles was right though, he deserved so much. The least Derek could do was answer him.

“I,” Derek was cut off again by Stiles shouting, but Derek had to answer Stiles. He had to. “Because you can never love me!” He shouted over Stiles. It was the first time he had raised his voice at Stiles in a very, very long time, and it made Stiles shut up. Derek thought he had scared Stiles, but he didn’t smell fear at all. Things were quite for a very long moment that seemed to drag on and on. He was wishing that the night sky would collapse and swallow him whole so he wouldn’t have to face Stiles. He didn’t want this to end. He didn’t want to stop seeing Stiles. The thought nearly broke him.

“Derek,” Stiles finally cut the silence with a broken whisper. It made Derek look up at Stiles and there were still tears in his eyes but he didn’t look angry anymore. “You- you really think I could never love you?” Derek closed his eyes and looked away.

“I know you couldn’t.” was all he answered with. Stiles surprised him by laughing an emotionless laugh.

“I’m pretty sure I already am in love with you.” Stiles said softly and Derek looked back to Stiles to quickly he was sure if he was human, he would've gotten whiplash. He had no clue what to say to that. “You’re such an idiot, Derek.” Stiles said as he walked up to Derek and took his hand. “Stay with me.” Stiles said again. Derek swallowed and looked at their hands together and then looked up to Stiles. He was smiling gently and it took Derek’s breath away. He nodded jerkily.

“Yeah, I- I’ll stay.” He said at last. He followed Stiles to his bed and got under the covers with him. Derek laid on his said facing Stiles, and the younger boy mirrored him. Derek reached out and grabbed Stiles’ hand and he just studied Stiles’ face and Stiles did the same to Derek.

”I was scared.” Derek said after a few minutes. Stiles didn’t reply; just squeezed Derek’s hand. “I- I don’t want to lose you.” Derek whispered closing his eyes. He felt Stiles move closer and soon enough, he had an armful of Stiles who was cuddling close to his chest.

“I don’t want to lose you either.” Stiles whispered back. Knowing Stiles felt the same made something that was keeping Derek tense, break. He relaxed completely into Stiles and he felt something he hadn’t felt in a very long time. He felt happy, and more importantly- he felt loved.


End file.
